Thought I would share this book I am reading, thanks to a friend who thought I would enjoy it both personally and professionally, and boy was she right! Most couples I work with and know in my personal life are doing their best to manage dual careers. In her recent book, Couples That Work, Jennifer Petriglieri spent five years researching and interviewing over 100 dual-working couples from all walks of life in over 30 countries. The author explores three life transitions that couples are typically challenged with throughout their career paths. In learning more about these challenges, there is also guidance on maintaining health relationships, personal growth and how to best support your partner. This piece stood out the most for me, as I often see couples struggle with effective communication. I also enjoyed how at the end of each chapter Jennifer summarized the key dynamics of each transition and certain tools and exercises. This book resonated with me in various ways and I highly recommend!
Wishing everyone a peaceful holiday season. One that no doubt looks and feels a little (or a lot) different from years past. Just a little reminder of the benefit of gratitude and positivity for good mental health! We have all been through so very much in 2020, some more than others but nonetheless a lot of change. Change is scary and something most people are naturally a little resistant to embrace. I think after this year we may all be a little better at dealing with and accepting change! Thinking about what we are grateful for, or changing a negative thought into a positive, helps with all of the transitions we are experiencing. So take a moment, write down what you’re grateful for in a journal and share some positivity with a friend or family member. I hope these quick activities help bring you and your family some peace and joy at the closing of 2020.
First Tuesday after Thanksgiving, aka Giving Tuesday!
There are so many ways to give back to your community. This is such a challenging time for everyone, whether its with finances, lack of food, clothes, or resources for medical needs. So of all years, this is one of those years to do what you can, if you can. It does not have to be monetary donations either. Giving Tuesday began in 2012 and since its start there are countless organizations and retailers that take part and give back to nonprofits and charities.
Here is a link with great suggestions on how to give back today (and any day): https://www.givingtuesday.org/blog/2018/11/how-give-back-givingtuesday
Worrying, overthinking or overanalyzing lately?? You’re not alone!! The good news, there are various simple habits to help decrease excessive worry and with it allow more control over your thoughts! Here are a few:
Stop trying to read someone’s mind. Usually when we guess what someones thinking, we are off! Instead try to communicate what you are thinking. It’s good practice and with it you will gain a deeper relationship by asking for what you want and having those open conversations.
Remind yourself that people generally don’t think of us as much as we think of us…sorry but its true. Just like you people have a lot going on and have their own thoughts. As much as we analyze what we said, how we said it, or a choice we made, chances are they are not overthinking a choice you made or an interaction you had with them. So don’t waste your time overthinking it!
Acknowledge your worry and LET IT GO! Easier said then done, I know. But if you consciously acknowledge your worries by writing them down or telling someone you trust to hear you out (and not try to solve anything for you), you can free yourself from your worry.
Learning to stop or reduce your worrying does not come easy, and these are only a few of various healthy habits to practice. Like most new habits it takes consistent practice and patience with yourself. Don’t forget to also practice kindness…to you! Positive self-talk goes a long way and can also help with decreasing your worries.
I had the privilege the work with a team of female teen athletes over the weekend…The focus, mental toughness!! Having mental strength is as important as physical strength for an athlete. Just like training our muscles, we need to train our minds to think positive, to build resiliency, take risks, use visualization and support our fellow teammates. This needs to be an ongoing conversation and like any other skill, mental toughness has to be continually practiced until it becomes part of our routine and more natural way of thinking.
Today marks 15 years since my father was violently taken from me, my family and our community. My grief as a victim of a violent crime is profound, even after all of these years, and at times it is all consuming. The fact that he was taken in a violent manner, with no warning, and no just cause adds another layer of challenging emotions. I wanted to just take a moment to acknowledge that there are many of us out there who have been through something like this. Maybe someone you know, probably many who you do not. Just a reminder that we all have something we are working through at any given moment. You always have the choice to be kind, to smile at someone just because, or to do a good deed…it may go farther than you think.
Please check out the link above. A colleague of mine is facilitating an online course at Stanford focusing on the challenges and opportunities of motherhood and working! What a fantastic and relevant topic so many of us are facing right now, myself included! Starts in September!
Over the weekend we took a day trip to New Melones Lake, located in the beautiful Sierra Nevada Foothills just outside of the cute little town of Angels Camp. The restrictions due to Covid-19 have fostered more road trips, local getaways and for us going to different lakes every chance we get, while staying within our social bubble. It’s no secret that getting outside, being in nature and adding some exercising has numerous benefits for our mental health. When I engage in these activities I find myself in a better mood, more patient with my children, I sleep better and honestly I just have a better outlook and perspective on small and big things in my life. So get outside….Doesn’t have to be fancy, doesn’t have to be for a long time, and you don’t have to overthink it!
As part of my practice I read many books covering various topics. Most recently I read the EDA’s Big Book. It was incredibly eye opening professionally but to be honest personally as well. I look forward to continuing to learn more about eating disorders, and to anyone struggling this book is a great place to start.
I recently spent some time with a wonderful group of girls from a local National Charity League discussing the challenges they are experiencing during this difficult time. I think it is so important to acknowledge the ambiguous losses, the stressors from of all the uncertainty and the many changes going forward that this age group will have to face. I’m glad to see resiliency, positive outlook’s and how this time has given so many teens a new perspective on life 🙂